Everyone knows how an oyster makes pearls. You start with a tiny grain of sand, and you add layer after layer until finally, there is a pearl.
Life is like that. You start by making little decisions. Gradually, every decision, no matter how small to begin with, gains in momentum as it is added to one thing at a time. You start by deciding that a college degree is going to be a necessity if you intend to have a career in, say, science. But what branch? Well, everyone says nursing is where it’s at… But wait. Because everyone has said that, every nursing program has a two-year wait list, only accepts 4.0 students, and two-year degrees are going away. Ok, make a decision, take another left turn…
Sometimes you have to pull up your big-girl panties and make a tough decision. I’m on the cusp of one of those, and it’s going to take a lot of research and thought, plus conferencing with advisers, before I can make the call. Because that’s what adults do. They look at the return on investment, the risks, and make a plan. You have to weigh the risks, and even then, things happen you can’t possibly foresee. I can plan for my own death, it is as inevitable as taxes, which I can also plan for. I can plan for accidents that leave me unable to complete school, I can plan for… so many other things. But sure as the great daemon Murphy lives and breathes, there will befall something I have not planned for.
One thing I’m trying hard not to do is treat this as a failure. Just because decisions must be made does not mean I have failed at my attempt. This is less a pole-vault, and more a puzzle that doesn’t have all the pieces. Wait – that sucks as a metaphor, too. Hm, I’ll have to think about that one.
There are many different kinds of pearls. I only own one kind in the real thing, although I have some lovely vintage glass replicas of the others. Some pearls are smooth, flawless orbs that seem to glow with an inner light. Others, the kind I like and own, are dimpled, rippled, and full of shadowed imperfections. I’d like to think I’m more like a freshwater pearl. Life hasn’t been smooth and perfect, but I have character.
I wonder where I can find raw oysters that I’d trust to eat in Ohio? I have a craving for some odd reason.