Encouraging Myself

Well, that took less than two weeks. I started out the year trying to set up some new routines, hoping to get more productive and work on health stuff. Tonight, I’m sitting here staring at the computer willing myself to come up with story so I can write… And feeling like crying because I’m not making a lot of progress, I’m probably forgetting stuff I should be doing, I’m a flaky artist, and why am I trying to do this again? 

I’m a mess. You all know that if you’ve read this blog for very long. And that first paragraph notwithstanding, I’m really not whining (well, trying not to) here today. Instead, I’m writing to let you know that it’s ok to feel the feels, it’s ok to ask for help, it’s ok to fail… You can always get up and take another step forward. You just can’t not try. That’s all. A little better every day. 

Me? I’m feeling crummy tonight because one of the things I was attempting was to move to one meal a day, at least on weekdays, as a way of controlling my caloric intake. At the two week mark, I’m going to say that doesn’t work for me. I come home at the end of the day, having only had a light snack during the workday, and I can’t even. The guys aren’t ready to eat, and when I come in hangry, I wind up eating crap just to try and balance it out and… so. That experiment failed to accomplish it’s intent. Time to recalibrate and try again, with protein bars while I’m walking on my lunch break. I can and I have for years now, done intermittent fasting. Just can’t do twenty hours of that. It’s ok. 

What is working: having a very small accountability group, and not the same people for each item on my personal challenge.  Touching base with someone outside my own head keeps me grounded, and I’m terribly grateful I have friends who don’t mind me melting into a sticky puddle of incoherent goo from time to time. What’s also working for me is using my spreadsheet daily journal to keep track of myself. I can look at that every evening, fill in the squares, and it makes my lil’ nerd heart happy. Everyone is different, but this works for me. I’m trying to exercise every day – took a couple of days off while sick, this last weekend. I’m making art every day. That’s easy, I’ve been doing it for about six years now. Writing every day – fiction, I’ve gotten every day in, and missed one day of non-fiction (this blog or MGC) – but that’s a small wordcount for now. I’m not worrying about how many words, just that they happen.  Setting up routines, setting habits. 

Things like alarms to remind me of my daily devotional are still a bit shaky. I need to recalibrate timing on that. I also need to reconsider my current status of ‘every moment of every day planned’ as that leaves me with no time to have… down. Just not doing anything. I’m not working non-stop, but I did put things like ‘husband time’ in the schedule and that’s staying. Important. 

It’s about momentum. Once a couple more weeks have passed, and these routines have settled into habits, I’ll add more balls to juggle. And I’ll keep reminding myself that I’m going to drop balls from time to time. The trick is picking them back up while keeping the other ones going! 

So don’t beat yourself up when you fall off the wagon. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, run to catch up, and plan a little rest in somewhere. You can do it. 

Yeah, I am talking to myself. What of it? 

10 thoughts on “Encouraging Myself

  1. Two suggestions with the food issue–first, smoothie shakes in the morning. Frozen fruit, fruit juice, and protein powder. Those hold me all day.

    Second, setting up slow cooker meals before leaving for work. Coming home to stew or chili already made makes it a lot easier to avoid the quick junk.

    1. Thank you. I think I could even manage a smoothie at work if I don’t need to use a blender there. Something premade?

      And I will have to start doing that. The guys talk about making meals, but then they either get sidetracked, or they aren’t preparing them until I’ve been home for a couple of hours. Which isn’t working. So I need to just make sure I’m doing it myself. One less thing for them to worry about.

  2. Cedar, your multi-talented skills, and interests, do provide alternate routes which are more soothing than sitting at the keyboard, whipping your Muse! Ye Muse is probably rustling through your larder-memory, planning a surprise cooking retreat. Grin.
    Now, for a personal note: I have a 10,000 lumen “lamp” set up a couple of feet to the left of me Lazyboy-reclined size 14 EEE feet, aimed to the left (yes the instructions say to site it 3 feet away while doing crafts, reading, or writing, shining directly on me = I worked outdoors for 10 to 12 hours a day, but I did not stare at the Sun alla-time! Grin).
    You do not have to spend $250.00 for the fancy unit. The lumen-rating of 100 watt lightbulbs is on the packages, as are the “warmth”, or visible light frequency ratings. An old 4-socket pole lamp can carry the four-holler weight, and many of them have individually switched sockets. Or you can get a chunk of plywood, attach 6 or eight ceramic sockets, and vary the mix of light bulbs to suit cooking, sewing, exercising, artisting, or even indulging your now well-illuminated Muse. Use a heavy-duty air-conditioner extension cord, or even a 6-outlet power bar which has the heavy-duty cord.
    Pictures to come by themselves.

  3. Happy lamps are totally needed in Winter, Texas or not! I have mine!
    As for OMAD, you need to make sure you are getting enough fat, and enough Electrolytes to carry you through with Satiety if you are going to try that. OMAD doesn’t work for me, Though I can go 14-16 hours if I watch the fat and electrolytes, though I don’t do that often. Usually I do 12-14 overnight if I’m not sick or other issues going on. Weren’t you doing Keto for a while?

    I made myself and hubby a challenge to complete 100 projects in 10 years (I hope to do much more than that, but it’s a start)…the operative word is COMPLETE. Something that I have a really hard time with. Starting is easy.

    So, something that needs to be said. I am proud of what you are accomplishing, with all the challenges, you should be proud, too. (I know that is super hard!)

    1. I was doing Keto and it works well for me. It complicates the family diet, though. I may go lower carb but not that low again.

      And thank you? I’m stumbling along, more or less in the same direction. Which might or might not be the right one.

  4. I felt crummy again last night … and I understand how you are feeling about the writing because I start for a couple of days and then stop again. That is no way to write– especially when I can’t seem to write more than 500 words at a time. Hugs

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